Mr. Incredible comes home late for dinner, too.

Someone asked me the other day, "How do you keep from resenting your husband?".  I said "I remember that I chose this life too."  Although there are times I wonder how a girl so independent and forward thinking ended up married to a man in the military and living in a place so devoid of culture, (I get stared at regularly and have to look around to remember a good portion of my torso is covered in tattoos...) I catch myself remembering the sense of adventure I had when this whole thing started. 
I married my husband knowing that he was in the military and being fully aware that he would have to travel a lot but up until about 3 years ago, he was the only one moving anywhere.  I was pretty spoiled by the fact that I met my husband in what was almost my home town.  I never had to live away from my sisters or my parents, at least not more than an hour.  So, here I am in the middle of nowhere, again.  My kids have already lived in 3 different states and my oldest is just turning 4!  There are a lot of things about military life they glaze over in the pamphlet.  And for me, the one thing they talk about the most, moving a lot, is the one thing I thought I wouldn't have to do!!  So, we're on move number 3? now and I am dealing with all of the things I didn't think to deal with before.  Again, my rarely used sense of adventure is tingling and I am ready to get the f*** out of dodge!  I don't know that I am excited about where we are heading but I am damn sure excited about not being here.  I don't think my husband or I have ever had such a case of vacationitis or short-timers syndrome.  It's hot here and humid and boring!  We are just ready to start our lives again.  We've been in limbo here, having had to practically start over and rebuild.  And in every sense too.  Up until September of 2009, we hadn't lived together for more than a couple months in the entirety of our marriage, we've been married 5 years!  So, we had to learn to live with each other and learn to be parents simultaneously.  These last 2 years have been extremely trying for both of us emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
Anyways, we all have times when we look over at our spouses and think "WTF! was I thinking?" We all have to sacrifice something to make a marriage work.  If we're lucky those sacrifices will be insignificant but if you think of your new family unit as "the greater good" then even the the big stuff will pale in comparison.  Remember the movie The Incredibles...

"Frozone: The public is in danger!

Honey: My evening's in danger!

Frozone: You tell me where my suit is woman! This is for the greater good!

Honey: I am your wife! I am the greatest 'good' you are ever gonna get!"

AND SOMETIMES, saving the world has to be more important than dinner. 

The things that bug me aren't living far away, it's the freedom we don't have.  We're so busy with this lifestyle and time off is so hard to come-by that we miss a lot of stuff.  Or worse, I have to go by myself!!!  I have been to one wedding with my husband in 6 years (besides our own) and it was at our house.  There have been 3 or more I've had to go to alone.  Stag at a wedding is not fun, especially, when you're already married.  That's the thing no one tells you about being a military spouse.  Being alone is the biggest downside of this job.  If I lived far away from my family but got to see my husband everyday and have bbqs on the weekends and all of that stuff, I think it would be a million times easier to be a military spouse.  We get married to grow old together and it is hard for some of us to take when we're just getting old and tired and not doing any of it together.  So, if you were to allow yourself to dwell on that, than yea, I'd be resentful too... But I love my husband and even when I am disappointed and feeling like life is unfair I try to remember that I signed that marriage certificate.  "For Better or Worse"